I prayed, I prayed, I prayed. I had faith in God and in this amazing team. St Thomas is a remarkable hospital. Finally the day has come where someone a medical professional was going to help me. This was part one of two surgeries, I was having my ribs removed on the left side of my chest under my collar bone which would hopefully make room in my chest for the second part of surgery which they would balloon my vein. Hoping to relieve pressure on the smaller veins which have been working major extra time to pump blood round my body and would create enough pressure to corrode and break down the blood clot in my sub clavian vein.
So I get into the hospital gown, the beautiful sea through surgery and the way that look like Bridget Jones knickers, or move all my Jory take off all my make up and answer loads of questions. They give me a warm blanket and they woke me down a very clinical hallway into the anaesthetic room where I meet to very wonderful they explain to me all the drugs they give me a let me on the bed and give me a lovely warm blanket because it is freezing, we have a laugh and a chat and they inject The anaesthetic into my arm and I say little prayer and hope that I wake up.
Well I had thought I’d been in a lot of pain in the past year but waking up from the surgery I have never experienced pain like it. I screamed and cried from the moment I woke up they sedated me a little longer and when I woke up I had a morphine drip button in my hand and I couldn’t I couldn’t believe the amount of pain I was experiencing. I really needed away but the amount of drugs that I had taken I could actually go to the toilet they tried to lift me up and put a bucket under me and I just I couldn’t move because the pain. My mum is a total mum she argued her way into the recovery room because I was at over six hours due to not been able to get the pain under control and she recorded me as high as a kite. When you’re in that much pain you don’t care what you look like you don’t care that you’re screaming that you’ve got underwear on then you can’t go to the toilet you just want this pain to stop. It was very traumatic and I would not wish that pain on my worst enemy.
The next few days were a complete blur I don’t remember anything apart from continually crying not being able to go to the toilet being given every drug to try and curb the pain I just felt like I’d been shocked that someone had cut me open and gutted me. I couldn’t move my neck I had a chest tube stuck in my neck and I am not crying I very rarely cry I don’t member the last time I cried. And this was a new experience for me because I didn’t know how to react well to express how much pain I was in then just cry, I felt hopeless, I felt lost.
My parents left my side, the nurses did everything they could to help and were incredible.
Next step Recovery.